Get your own
 diary at DiaryLand.com! contact me older entries

2011-01-03 - 8:09 p.m.

Recently, I caught a friend's Facebook status about how last year was a waste. Somehow, I couldn't resist replying:

"Never call anything a 'waste'. Mistakes are 'certain sacrifices' in a constant learning process for everyone to become better."

I swear to you, people.:P A decade ago, you wouldn't have possibly heard something like that coming from me. No joke. Why? Having lived with a perfectionist father could get you that much. Maybe I'm tired. Maybe I'm sick to death of people's impossible expectations on me to be perfect. Isn't that exhausting? So what if you have flaws and mistakes? We all do. At least you try not to cause too much of a damage on other people.

Still, I'm not going to lie to you. I'm not a saint. (Of course, silly.:P Nobody is and never will be.) I still can't stand people who believe they're always right and intentionally point out other people's mistakes in public - in order to simply embarrass them. I mean, how insecure can they really be? Imagine if the tables are turned. It could happen to anybody.

Mz.D says that if you're too used to winning everything and getting all you want all the time, the crash landing can hurt twice as worse than if you're used to accepting that not everything is always under your control. I agree, although I sometimes wish it didn't have to be that way in order to avoid a person from taking things for granted.

Somehow, I get a feeling that she keeps reminding me that, so I won't quit so easily. That's the kind of friend you need when the world gets less friendlier.

I visited nearby relatives last Saturday night. I met a distant cousin, whom was also my senior in college. When I asked about her husband (whom also had been her college sweetheart, I know), her simple response had embarrassed me:

"Oh, we're not together anymore. It's been a year."

Oops.*blushes* "Sorry."

"That's okay." She smiled. "We haven't seen each other in a while, so you didn't know."

Still, awkward. I'd seen them together back in college. I knew the guy too, although not personally. I thought they were just...perfect. (Aargh, I'm using that word again!:P) But we've already known that, haven't we? Even the picture-perfect romance doesn't really offer a lasting eternity. It's just a beautiful illusion to entertain your reality.

And yes, I'm being a cynic again.*big evil grin* What?:P You don't like it? Well, too bad...so sad. This is me, so deal with it.*sneers*

"Now I'm single again."

"True happiness comes within," I offered positively. She smiled again.:)

"You're right," she agreed. "If we can still be happy with ourselves, why do we have to worry about being single?"

I felt a moment of rare connection with her. It was strange. Up to now, I'm still unsure with how to put it right. For a rare moment, I felt that she and I understood each other very well. I mean, I never know how it feels to be a girlfriend or a wife. I only know how it feels to love someone but have to let them go in the end. Hell, I do that all the time. Am I an expert already?:P

If they think I'm pathetic, they should try my shoes. Then they can start talking.:P

"A perfectionist treats mistakes as hideous failures and unnecessary misfortunes. A resigning soul treats them as certain sacrifices in a constant, learning process."

The Author/SBF/QB

 

 

previous - next

about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!